2020 was a year unlike anything else; like a popcorn kernel stuck between your teeth that you can feel but not see. Or like that one line of dirt that always remains however many times you sweep.
It would suffice to say that ‘Death to 2020’ is the common emotion right now as we wrap up the season finale of this tumultuous year. The cosmic Gods took pity, and thankfully, the aliens did not invade earth. However, don’t feel alarmed when I tell you that the next few years are pronounced “2020–1” , “2020–2” and so on and so forth.
On a more serious note, if you’re reading this, give yourself a pat on the back. You made it out. Not everyone was as lucky, and while we will raise a glass to them each day considering we’re working from home, (Yes, I peaked a bit into Australian TV to get early preview of 2021, and it’s still the same) kudos to you for beating out humanity catalyzed natural selection.(So far, but I’m rooting for you.) You now have an awesome tale of bravado, resilience, and courage to enthrall the yet-to-be born generation.
2020 tested a lot out of us; our patience, determination, and the collective commitment to string a piece of cloth across our face and mask our well-being so that when anti-mask Karens go all “Third-Revelation” on us, we can shield ourselves from the literal filth they’d spew. I almost see 2020 being used a verb akin to Google. If you’re having trouble visualizing it, let me illustrate it for you using a few examples-
“ Don’t 2020 it for me dude”
“Damn boy, why you gotta act all 2020 like that! “
DO call me a visionary if you come across this lingo in the next few years. If not, we will post it on r/agedlikemilk to garner internet fairy points. (It’s a win-win in my book)
We saw, tried, and conquered a lot of trends in 2020. From bread starter recipes, to our dologna coffee phase, we consoled ourselves that killer bees were at best just a phase in 2020’s life. We cheered for each other virtually, and we were there for each other virtually. Zoom stock skyrocketed instead of the airline firms, and we actually got to realize that 90% meetings could be avoided with a simple email. (Talking of emails, please for the love of almighty, don’t click “reply all”. Seriously.)
As we turn the corner on 2021, here’s my unsolicited advice; I’m kidding, I’m no one to give you advice. Instead let me leave you with a Life Pro Tip: If you’re on zoom, you don’t have to toggle between muting and unmuting yourself. Just mute yourself once, and press spacebar to temporarily voice yourself. As soon you remove your fingers off the spacebar, your microphone will mute itself again.
Hope that makes your 2021 a tad bit better and easier. After all, it’s gonna be while before a normal version of the planet is restored; if there ever was such a thing.
